We launched today, after almost two full months of delays.
This is a dream I’ve been holding in my heart, in my mind for over four years. I’ve followed Instagram accounts, YouTube Channels, and pinned dozens of RV posts for years. I wasn’t afraid of it at all, until the first week of September.
Since then my anxiety over this trip has been amping up (30 amps of course!). With each obstacle we faced, and there were many, I strongly battled paralyzing anxiety.
The Dream Becomes a Nightmare’
The first time I towed, I experienced a panic attack. Today, our fifth-declared “launch day” had two challenges. First, just before midnight our pop out queen bed BROKE with my husband and baby in bed. Second, our door handle stopped working and we had to have my friend open the door from the inside (instead of taking an emergency exit).
I fell hard and fast right into “I don’t want to do this, this is a terrible idea, I can’t do this, I just want to move to a house” rants. I cried, I kept feeling as though I couldn’t make myself come out of it. My kids were incredibly sweet and supportive of me during my panic. Hugs, affirmations, encouragement. They are such a blessing. Everyone has been in bed for about two hours, except me. I took time alone and now am ready for bed feeling restful and PEACEFUL.
I have some thoughts about what got me moving forward even though I felt paralysis.
You need to be grounded in your outcome.
My outcome is my kids to experience more nature. For me to spend more time outdoors. For our family to learn together about cultures, history, scientific observations. To dive deeper into work I love and support our family on the road. To grow closer as a family.
The dream, the vision of what we are aiming for has to stay before me or else I lose perspective. So, find that vision, what it looks like, smells like, maybe tastes like, what it sounds like what it physically and emotionally feels like.
For me that feeling is FREEDOM, throw caution to the wind peaceful joy.
Sometimes we do have to go through a rough patch to get where we want to be. I was SO tempted to settle for the status quo today. Keep your eyes on the prize.
I’m going to say it: Self Care
I did my self care to make sure I could bring my own vibration up. I took three vitamins because they always calm my nerves.
I also oiled up, I put on some favorite emotional oils to help me connect to my vision.
It doesn’t matter if your Bold Action is a phone call or a complete lifestyle change. If you want it, you really can do it. And I highly recommend getting someone in your corner to cheer you on, daily discipline yourself to connect to your purpose and finally support your body in ways that bring your anxiety from paralyzing to manageable.
I’m so glad you stopped by today to read this, I’d love to hear from you. What are your favorite self care things to bring your anxiety under control?
Birth is a very special time in your life, but it's one day out of the entire childbearing year. 
1 Comment